Memory
by Catherine E. Grant
Summary: As a teenager, David Goldstein reflects over his memories of his mother


MEMORY  
Author: Catherine E. Grant (avatar_31@angelfire.com)  
  
Author's Note: This is a reworked version of 'Keeping Up Appearances,' using the same intro, different characters and keeping Rachel dead.   
  
Summary: As a teenager, David Goldstein reflects over his memories of his mother.   
  
-  
MEMORY  
-  
  
David fidgeted uneasily at his desk and looked again at the clock. Half an hour into class. Only half an hour gone yet it seemed like days had passed. Why did he have to have school today, of all days?  
  
He looked again at the sunny blueness outside the tiny classroom. If only he could go! He sighed, steepling his hands and glancing round the class again. It was a subject he was usually interested in, but he couldn't concentrate at all today. And David wasn't fooling himself as to the reason.   
  
His mother's birthday.  
  
Rachel Maree Goldstein, killed in the line of duty. Fatally stabbed during a passport investigation five years ago.   
  
He opened his folder to glance through the slim album he'd hidden between its pages this morning. Newspaper clippings, letters, photos. Rachel, smiling. Rachel looking pensive. As a young uniform. With Frank. With Jack and Mick. With Dad, on their wedding and later. With David himself. How young was he?   
  
David bit his lip as he stared down at the final photo, embarrassing tears threatening at the corner of each eye. His mother was standing outside the Water Police Station, looking as happy as he'd ever seen her. She had one arm on David's shoulder, and one arm around Frank. Helen stood on the other side of her, Taylor and Gavin next to her. Mick and Jack crouched either side of David, Tommy next to Mick and Jeff beside Jack.   
  
Their last Christmas together.  
  
He could still see the look on his mother's face after Frank stole a kiss underneath the mistletoe. They'd all thought she was going to hit him, but she just laughed. Not that she hadn't been furious, though.  
  
"David!" the hissed whisper from behind broke his reverie. David half-turned in his seat, making sure he hid the album. God only knew the kind of teasing he'd receive if his classmates saw what he kept in his desk. He'd never hear the end of it.  
  
"You'd better pay attention or you'll cop it" his friend warned hurriedly. "Cratchley's ignored you so far, he's in a good mood, but don't push it, okay?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"C'mon, don't tell me you forgot! He's got some coppers coming in today to talk about the rising number of police deaths on duty and-"  
  
Police deaths on duty. Whatever else he had to say David didn't hear.  
  
Mum, laughing and hugging him.  
  
Mum at the station, checking her gun and going out to risk her life again.  
  
Mum, dying on the floor of an empty warehouse, her life spent.  
  
Duty. Was that what they called it?  
  
"David! Dav-id! Shit, what's wrong with you? You've been funny all week!"  
  
"What?" he shook himself.  
  
"You. You've been acting really strange lately, is anything wrong?" Genuine concern showed in the other boy's voice. David forced himself to smile and shake his head.  
  
"Nah, thanks mate, I'm fine."  
  
"You sure?"  
  
"Yeah."   
  
No one else could understand. Dad hadn't even remembered what day it was.  
  
"C'mon!" He got an elbow in his ribs for his day dream. "Wake up Goldstein, the cops are here, ACT NORMAL!" The tag line of the popular in-joke brought a shadow of a smile to David's face. Yeah, act normal; get ready to hear all about the price of duty.  
  
The price his Mum had paid.  
  
Would he ever get used to that?  
  
"So now I'd like to introduce Chief Inspector Helen Blakemore, Senior Sergeant Jack Christie and Detective Senior Constable Taylor Johnson, from the Sydney Water Police. Chief Inspector?"  
  
"Yes, well thank you" Helen began quietly. "We agreed to talk to you today because we've all lost someone in the line of duty, and I don't think we'll ever fully get over her loss. One of the best detectives I've ever known was fatally stabbed in the stomach during a passport investigation nearly five years ago now." She paused, taking a deep breath.  
  
David was having a hard time listening. Finally he jumped to his feet, dumping his folders inside the desk and hugging the precious album to his chest.   
  
"I don't have to listen to this!" he yelled angrily. "Do you even know what today is!?"  
  
His classmates and teacher reacted with varying degrees of surprise, disappointment and amusement, but David was unfazed. "I don't want to hear this!"  
  
He dove for the door but Christie restrained him. "I know, mate" he said awkwardly. "We just never thought you might be here."  
  
"Never thought is right!" David couldn't stop the tears any more. Hesitatingly Jack put his arms around the sobbing teenager. Hell, he knew how hard it was. He shouldn't have made it any worse on the poor kid. A moment passed then Helen and Taylor stepped forward to add their support and embrace.  
  
Finally David broke free and looked tearfully at his mother's friends. "Each time I think I'm over her, something reminds me" he said quietly.   
  
"Yeah, me too" agreed Helen, Taylor nodding silently. "It's too quiet around the station, no fights - the D's all get along!"  
  
"Me, Mick and a senior connie from undercover" Taylor answered the question David hadn't asked. "Mick and I try to squabble a bit but it doesn't really work!" she added, and managed a slight grin. "Frank came back about two years ago - did you see him?"  
  
David nodded. "Yeah, he came round, Dad threw him out, Frank tried to rearrange his face, said he'd never forgive him for wrecking Mum's life. Then he took me out for dinner and we just talked. Said he wasn't coming back."  
  
"Don't blame him" Jack said wholeheartedly, "he loved her more than anyone, so much would remind him of her."  
  
"You loved her too." It was a statement, not a question.  
  
"Not as much as Frank did. Hell, I thought I did, I know I did, but I couldn't give her the kind of self-absorbing love he did. No matter how many times she rejected him, he kept coming back, just to be there for her. He loved her that much."  
  
"Uh huh." David nodded slightly, then offered "I have some photos and stuff of Mum. Would you like to see them? There's a photo of everyone, too, from the last Christmas we all had."  
  
Tears filled Helen's eyes; blindly she groped for a tissue. Taylor put one into her hand with the familiarity of long practice. She sniffled her thanks. "Oh, yes David, we'd love too...Hell this doesn't get any easier, I miss her so much!"   
  
"It's not so bad if we think about the good times" put in her niece.   
  
Jack added "Yeah, Rach wouldn't want us sniffling over her, she'd be embarrassed by the fuss! She never was the sort of person to go in for big celebrations or anything."  
  
David sat on the desk at the front of the room; Taylor squished up next to him and the others stood either side, even though Jack had to crane his neck a bit to see. Slowly they went through the memorabilia of the one they had lost, sharing the good times, laughing over the fun ones and commiserating over the hurdles they'd overcome.  
  
The mending had begun.   
  
THE END  
  
Well I used the same start as 'Keeping Up Appearances', aren't I lazy? But I wasn't happy with that story; I'll leave it up but I actually prefer this one as I feel the other had a weaker storyline. Let me know what you think.  
  
Email: avatar_31@angelfire.com  
  



End file.
